Monday, November 21, 2011

The Middle Of Three Is Second Best; The Middle Of One Is Me

Just try your best...
Live right now
Yeah, just be yourself,
It doesn't matter if it's good enough
For someone else

-"The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World

I only fail when I have to measure myself against the successes of others.

Online high score tables? Most of the game websites I visiting, I'm playing against kids who can spend all day online and playing games (except when their parents make them stop and go do homework). I will never be able to measure up to that kind of competition, because I don't have the training or innate ability. I play to enjoy myself, and that's all that matters.

Art communities? Who need s a degree to make art? I don't. I have a powerful enough imagination and the means to capture my visions in a medium of my choosing. So what if I don't have thousands, or even hundreds, of page-views? I also haven't sold myself out to get popular. I create the work I want, and those who need to see it, need to touch I can provide, will come find me.

Matchmaking websites? I'm doing well enough on my own. Yes, it'd be nice to have more friends, or to have a warm body to snuggle up against at night, and yes, I miss both those things. But I've had moments where I was surrounded by people who called themselves my friends, never felt more alone. Yes, I've had a warm body to snuggle up against at night, and it has cost me so much more than I gained.

I do know that with my written words I have touched people's hearts and souls, brought them back from the event horizon, brightened their days and their lives. I do know that my captured visions and dreams have encouraged others to dream without fear, to not just reach for the stars but beyond them, and taught them that not everything that goes up must come back down. And I know damn well that nobody else makes mohawk-hats like I do, because I've looked. (Genie, from Aladdin). Do you think I'd spend twenty-five hours to make a thirty-dollar hat if someone else did it better or for less?

You know you want to. Go on, commission one of my hats.